Phuket Taxi and Transfers

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Thread: Thai Family Visiting.

  1. #1
    Uber Star Soi wanderer Uber Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน briofoz's Avatar
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    Thai Family Visiting.

    Interesting thread in TV, this reply to the OP is worth sharing...

    "The correct answer to the OP's question is an infinite number.



    This is obviously your first time being exposed to masochism on this scale. You will learn much Grasshopper, but be wary.



    Don't go anywhere near an MK or anything similar. Basically stay away from any food establishment with a menu.



    Give your missus a fixed amount of cash (the amount is up to you), and tell her that's all there is to feed/entertain/cloth/buy gifts/show superiority with for the duration, and there ain't no more where that came from. She will (if she's got half a brain) budget appropriately and decide that dogfood cooked at home at 30B/head is a better option than a restaurant at 250B+ per head.



    Be aware of the truck that will have an empty tank when they finally decide to leave and you will be asked to cough up the baht to fill it.



    Remember that a "week" in Thai speak means as long as they are having a good time. Limit their enjoyment accordingly.



    Make yourself absent when it's time to pay the bins.



    Maintain a stupid grin on your face at all times.



    Empty all your cupboards of anything remotely resembling alcohol.



    Hide all your shoes and use theirs - always choose the best pair of flip-flops.



    On at least one occasion, nick their truck and drive around for 2 hours to consume fuel, and then arrive home without saying anything. This is perfectly normal. Keep YOUR truck/car keys on your person at all times.



    Beware when going out the door because you will break your neck on the huge number of footwear laying around.



    Take every conceivable opportunity to pilfer cigarettes and whisky from the visiting tribe.



    If you don't know the Thai for "what the F are you doing", or "don't do that", or "leave that alone", then learn it.



    Best of luck Grasshopper - give us an update when you've survived the ordeals. whistling.gif



    EDIT: I almost forgot the most important thing. Make sure your wife tells them the couch and the remote control are YOURS and when you enter the room, whomever is on the couch and is holding the remote will give you a big wai, depart the couch, and offer the remote to you IMMEDIATELY. The first time somebody fails to do so, throw yourself on the couch, grab the remote and change to an English channel while saying the F word repeatedly. This is similar to a soi dog marking his territory and will be instantly understood.biggrin.png "
    Quarky, Changone, Zablive and 2 others like this.

  2. #2
    Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน Hatari's Avatar
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    She will (if she's got half a brain)
    go back a few steps - the half a brain (or less) - the foreigner who married into it.
    What did he expect?
    wabbits, Minder and Zablive like this.

  3. #3
    ประเทศไทยเพื่อน Founding Member Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน Changone's Avatar
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    Well I thought it was funny....
    Newbie question, Oldie reply.
    briofoz likes this.
    And where the hell was Biggles.....?....when you needed him last Saturday....?

  4. #4
    Uber Star Soi wanderer Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน Zablive's Avatar
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    What to expect FFS!?
    Otis Redding wrote it and Aretha Franklin made it famous.

    R E S P E C T

    If they can't learn that in My Bahn - "koff".

    P.S. All the whiskey is kept in my Mancave.
    Last edited by Zablive; 13th December 2014 at 14:34.

  5. #5
    Uber Star Soi wanderer Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน Dupree's Avatar
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    Man cave....

    Edit. I swear to God Baz. We wrote it simultaneously...55
    I just girl in bar. Buy me one dink?....

  6. #6
    Uber Star Soi wanderer Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน Zablive's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Dupree View Post
    Man cave....

    Edit. I swear to God Baz. We wrote it simultaneously...55
    OMB - we are on the same wavelength! 5555!
    I'm gunna buy another fridge for Xmas for the Cave - then all the grog and ice cubes will be within arms reach.

  7. #7
    Uber Star Soi wanderer Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน MarcTwoSix's Avatar
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    In the early days.....my BIL's would try it on and think we erre going to pay for everything but they soon learned I am not afraid to be blunt and say no.
    We obviously still pay for a good amount, same as I do for my family, since we are in the best situation in both families.

    But they know they aren't going to ask us for every little thing.

    My wife says "my family afraid you". 555
    I think she just means they know I am not a pushover.

    All and all.....they are a good bunch of people.
    Have a couple bad apples but I dont have an issue of letting it known that I am not having any of their BS

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