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Thread: Amazing survival stories

  1. #1
    Frequent Flyer kaptainrob's Avatar
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    Amazing survival stories

    3 years adrift in the Pacific's garbage dump > Shipwreck Survivor Rescued After Spending 3 years on the Great Pacific Garbage Patch*|*

    Think that was good?

    How about 17 years underground >
    China: Miner Found Alive After 17 Years Underground*|*
    Cheers, Rob.
    Lifes journey is not to arrive at the grave safely in a well-preserved body, but to skid in sideways totally worn out, shouting: holy s.h.i.t what a ride!

  2. #2
    Organic AI Quarky's Avatar
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    They are both fake KR. Shame... as I love stories like that.. 55

    I think the whole paper is mostly fake stories...

    snopes.com: China: Miner Found Alive After 17 Years Underground

    Soon afterwards links and excerpts referencing this item were being circulated via social media, with many of those who encountered it mistaking it for a genuine news article. However, that article was just another spoof from World News Daily Report, a tabloid-like web site whose stock in trade is publishing fantastically fictional stories such "Giant Housecat Now Available on Market" and "Apple Announces Release of Paranormal Communication Application
    Read more at snopes.com: China: Miner Found Alive After 17 Years Underground
    My only experience was in a pie making factory managing the gravy team


  3. #3
    Uber Star Soi wanderer Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน Stillearly's Avatar
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    DISCLAIMER

    World News Daily Report is a news and political satire web publication, which may or may not use real names, often in semi-real or mostly fictitious ways. All news articles contained within worldnewsdailyreport.com are fiction, and presumably fake news. Any resemblance to the truth is purely coincidental, except for all references to politicians and/or celebrities, in which case they are based on real people, but still based almost entirely in fiction.
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  4. #4
    Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน Hatari's Avatar
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    while we're at it . . . (though this one may be true?)

    New Visa Rules Exclude Everyone Except Sex Tourists, Alcoholics, Drug Addicts, Ravers, Illiterate Troglodytes

    BANGKOK – Citing the need for maintaining order and unity during the transition to reform, the Council for Maintaining Peace and Order (CMPO) announced strict new visa rules for foreigners wishing to enter the kingdom.


    Some of the “high quality tourists” the CMPO says are welcome in Thailand

    Effective today, tourist and non-immigrant business visas will be limited only to persons whose motives for entering Thailand involve solicitation of sex workers, consumption of alcholic beverages and mind-altering illicit substances, attendance at all-night music parties, or petty criminal activity that doesn’t involve politics.

    “Thailand can no longer endure the presence of certain types of undesirable persons, such as journalists, academics, NGO employees, teachers, responsible business owners, or those working for charitable social organizations,” said Air Force chief Air Chief Marshal Prajin Juntong, the NCPO’s economic chief and acting head of Immigration.

    “Foreigners who engage in activities such as writing, reading, thinking, discussion, dissemination of truthful information, the betterment of underprivileged people, and empathy with the electoral majority are simply incompatible with maintaining unity among all Thais.”
    “We have tried to be patient with these people, but they continue to repeatedly offend with their actions,” he added.

    Prajin stressed that Thailand was still a welcoming place with famous hospitality, but that the nation would now focus on attracting “ high quality tourism.”

    “We wish to extend our warmest invitations to anyone who would like to sexually exploit our women and lax drug enforcement policies, as well as those seeking self-destructive entertainment that leaves no time or brain cells for the contemplation of society, politics, or justice.”

    Foreigners caught reading books on Thai history, or with a blood alcohol level of under 0.1% risked deportation.

    Consideration was being made for certain exceptions, such as allowing English teachers who were unqualified to do anything else, so long as those teachers agreed to spend all their earnings on prostitutes and drugs, rather than save up for starting a business.

    Short-term tourists from rich nations would still be welcome in Bangkok, so long as they were on package tours that took them directly from their hotels to well-known landmarks such as Wat Arun and the Grand Palace. Upcountry tourism is prohibited under the new rules, to prevent “any possible encounters between foreigners and non-compliant Thai nationals.”

    Entry visas would also be contingent upon adequately failing a Thai language test, Prajin added.

  5. #5
    Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน Hatari's Avatar
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    Non-Naked, Non-German, Non-Sex Tourist Plunges From Hotel Window

    Thai Police Baffled At Unprecedented “Karl Slym” Case


    Karl Slym fell from a 22nd story window despite not being German

    BANGKOK – The Royal Thai Police are asking the public to help with any leads in the mysterious death of Karl Slym, 51, who died after jumping out of a hotel window Monday despite not being naked, German, or in the presence of one or more Thai prostitutes.

    “We’ve simply never seen a case like this before,” said Police Lieutenant Somyot Boonyakeow, an investigator on the case. “Mr Slym was fully clothed, and an autopsy reveals that he was not under the influence of alcohol, drugs, Viagra, or Cialis.”

    “It doesn’t fit any profile of any hotel-falling death in Thailand we’ve ever seen,” he continued.

    “We searched the hotel room for two hours trying to find the prostitutes, but they had already left,” said Somyot. “The hotel staff insisted they hadn’t seen Mr Slym in the company of any prostitutes, so to us that suggests a massive cover-up by influential persons.”

    Additionally, police regard the crime site as unusual, as the Shangri-La is a legitimate 5-star international tourist hotel, rather than a two-star guesthouse with giant towels for blankets and views of brick walls, the typical site for a “jumper.”

    Further complicating the investigation was the presence of Slym’s wife in the hotel room at the time of the death.

    “We don’t really have a procedure for dealing with foreign wives present at the scene of the incident,” explained Somyot. “It’s never happened before.”

    “She’s actually the first foreign wife I’ve ever met,” he said. “Nice lady.”

    A full forensics autopsy, complicated by the fact that the victim was “fully clothed, which we’ve also never dealt with,” according to Somyot, confirmed that Slym was sober and healthy for his age. Records obtained from Slym’s home country of Britain showed no signs of depression or alcoholism, or any history of criminal behavior.

    Police have questioned Slym’s colleagues and friends, who have characterized him as a successful, hardworking, thoughtful person who was not into deviant sexual practices or in debt to the Russian mafia in Pattaya.

    “In thirty years as a policeman I’ve never encountered such a twisted situation,” said Somyot.

    “Mr Slym is simply like no man I’ve ever investigated in Thailand.”
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  6. #6
    Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน Hatari's Avatar
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    just one more 'amazing story' - believe it or not


    Just some of the tacky patriotic Americans who will make good use of Thailand’s political leftovers

    900 Tons Of Unsold Red-White-Blue Protest Crap Donated To US Republicans

    WASHINGTON – In what is being hailed as a landmark act of political recycling, hundreds of tons of yet-unsold Thai-flag themed accessories are being shipped to the United States, where they will be given as a gift to members of the US-based Republican Party.

    “We didn’t want to see so much merchandise go to waste, no matter how ugly it is” explained Kittirat Uropong, a spokesperson for the businesses.

    “So we started hunting online for some organization that could use several million red, white, and blue hats, T-shirts, belts, ribbons, handbags, headbands, sunglasses, face-painting kits, whistles, dog sweaters, bumper stickers, wristbands, Christmas ornaments, ball-point pens, coffee mugs, temporary tattoos, and iPhone covers. As it turns out, the only group with the same taste as the PDRC is the Republican Party.”

    As of today, hundreds of tons of tri-color junk had been trucked from the former Bangkok protest sites and were being loaded into container ships at the port of Laem Chabang. It is expected that the approximately 4,000,000,000 items will arrive in the US for customs clearance in 45 days.

    The donated flag-themed accessories are expected to be distributed to Republican party supporters at candidate campaign rallies and politically-motivated crowd events beginning this summer, including at large gatherings by the right-wing Tea Party movement and anti-abortion protests.

    When asked whether American conservatives might hesitate to wear recycled protest gear that was modeled after the flag of a foreign country, Kittirat laughed.

    “The average American couldn’t find Thailand on a map,” he said. “And the average Republican doesn’t even know that other countries exist.”

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  7. #7
    Uber Star Soi wanderer Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน slampay's Avatar
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    I spent nearly ten years married....

    Completely on topic! 55
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  8. #8
    Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน Hatari's Avatar
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    should have mentioned - this is based around a real incident in January this year. Karl Slym was managing director of Tata Motors, India's biggest carmaker. He jumped/fell reportedly after an argument with his wife.

    He fell from the 22nd floor to the 4th floor of the Shangri-La Hotel in Bangkok where he was to attend a meeting of Tata Motors Thailand. According to Police Lieutenant-Colonel Somoyot Boonnakaev, "he had to make an effort to get through" a "very small window" making it impossible to drop accidentally.
    Quote Originally Posted by Hatari View Post
    Non-Naked, Non-German, Non-Sex Tourist Plunges From Hotel Window

    Thai Police Baffled At Unprecedented “Karl Slym” Case

  9. #9
    Uber Star Soi wanderer Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน
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    Quote Originally Posted by slampay View Post
    I spent nearly ten years married....

    Completely on topic! 55
    I've got you beat. My first marriage lasted 10 years longer than that. But my second marriage lasted 3 years less than yours. I finally learned my lesson like I always do... the hard way.

    And yes, it is on topic. We survived. I've had some weird experiences in the Philippines and Thailand though. So far so good, but there's always this coming winter to think of.

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