Opinion: Would you ask if you can watch a sporting event if invited to BBQ/dinner

[MarcTwoSix]

This came up today:

We got invited to a casual dinner at Ao's friends house
It is just us and the host couple and we hang out all the time.

Ao asked me if I wanted to go but our NBA Finals is on.
So I said I would go if we can put the game on .

She told her friend and her bf(who I know well) said absolutely.

Ao kinda thought that was rude

I wouldn't do it at a formal dinner party but just hanging out, I don't see anything wrong with it.

I'm not following the hockey finals but if we had people over and they wanted to watch the hockey I'd put it on.

[Quarky]

Absolutely I would ask... and if they say no... they are off the friends list... 55

[MarcTwoSix]

Absolutely I would ask... and if they say no... they are off the friends list... 55

In Boston and NYC.....it would be a no brainer
Everyone watches sports and they always on in the background at the least.

Hell, in my family the guys eat in the living room on holidays if a good game is on!

[Quarky]

In Boston and NYC.....it would be a no brainer
Everyone watches sports and they always on in the background at the least.

Hell, in my family the guys eat in the living room on holidays if a good game is on!

I guess with people you don't know very well it's more difficult... but a good way to decide if they are friends material...

[Changone]

This came up today:

We got invited to a casual dinner at Ao's friends house
It is just us and the host couple and we hang out all the time.

Ao asked me if I wanted to go but our NBA Finals is on.
So I said I would go if we can put the game on .

She told her friend and her bf(who I know well) said absolutely.

Ao kinda thought that was rude

I wouldn't do it at a formal dinner party but just hanging out, I don't see anything wrong with it.

I'm not following the hockey finals but if we had people over and they wanted to watch the hockey I'd put it on.

I get this a bit, usually it is because they feel you have already agreed to go and are now putting unrealistic (to them) conditions on going. Ones they haven't mentioned to the host yet. Any chance she mentioned going before that and you somehow agreed...?
I guess what I'm saying is by the time she asks you, it's not really a choice to say anything but unconditional yes.

[slampay]

I think she's just looking for reasons to be angry with you...

[MarcTwoSix]

I get this a bit, usually it is because they feel you have already agreed to go and are now putting unrealistic (to them) conditions on going. Ones they haven't mentioned to the host yet. Any chance she mentioned going before that and you somehow agreed...?
I guess what I'm saying is by the time she asks you, it's not really a choice to say anything but unconditional yes.

Umm.....you don't know me well enough C1
Paulie wasn't going unless I could watch the game 555

[MarcTwoSix]

I think she's just looking for reasons to be angry with you...

Nah
It was a conversation.....not even any sort of issue

[YankeeDK]

If it's just you and them and you know them, that's perfectly fine. If there were more people or you didn't know them, it might seem a bit rude.

[Changone]

Umm.....you don't know me well enough C1
Paulie wasn't going unless I could watch the game 555

Seems so obvious to us though doesn't it? I mean how could anyone even dream you would go somewhere
where there was the slightest possibility you couldn't watch the game?

Could be part of the whole Thai face saving thing. You know, someone asks you on a social occasion and you have not said no, only "I will ask my husband", with the unspoken assurance that he will say YES.

But the only way out of it is she/they get it in their head that you agreed to go sometime before, even if you are sure you didn't...555

[MarcTwoSix]

Seems so obvious to us though doesn't it? I mean how could anyone even dream you would go somewhere
where there was the slightest possibility you couldn't watch the game?

Could be part of the whole Thai face saving thing. You know, someone asks you on a social occasion and you have not said no, only "I will ask my husband", with the unspoken assurance that he will say YES.

But the only way out of it is she/they get it in their head that you agreed to go sometime before, even if you are sure you didn't...555

You confuse me more than my Thai wife sometimes 555

I think you ate just smarter than me! I don't mean that as a back handed compliment either

[Changone]

You confuse me more than my Thai wife sometimes 555

I think you ate just smarter than me! I don't mean that as a back handed compliment either

55555...ok, I will defer to Khun Slam's more direct analysis....555

[MarcTwoSix]

55555...ok, I will defer to Khun Slam's more direct analysis....555

Khum Slam think too mutt.

It was a simple .....shake of the head, I can't believe you gsvd to watch sport.

I just thought it was a fun question to ask them forum

I got a lot more problems to fret about with my than a basketball game 555

Although the couple we were with tonight makes us look like the best relationship in the world!! 555

The definition of disfuntional!!

[Seven_]

I would say its rude if you turn up and then ask (depending on the friendship though), but if you ask first before you go, I think its fine as they have the option of refusing, thus giving you the choice of what you do.

[PeteGill]

It depends on what sport or game. When it comes to my local rugby team I honestly prefer to watch by myself, no interruption's or inane comments from any other expert apart from me 555
So I would rather just download and watch later, or re-schedule accordingly.

But if push comes to shove I could watch with others and then go home and watch, analyse by my self. But that would only be for games that I am totally committed to.

[bacwaan]

I've had this a few times back when married....my answer to any invitation on game nights was "you know I wanna watch the rugby...so maybe best if you go alone...unless of course (insert husband's name here) will be watching the game on the night and we can watch it together..if ya wanna check on it and he's OK with it I'll come"

[bacwaan]

One of the funniest instances of something like this I can ever remember....we had a good friend from the USA who used to come to NZ to conduct my wife's orchestra...I converted him to become an All Black's fan...he used to love the haka and would try to emulate it whilst the boys were doing it before matches (yes...very irritating but kinda cute too)...i also took him to several matches and introduced him to some of the players who I knew at the time..he was totally awestruck by them

anyway...he was staying with us this time and the All Blacks were playing Australia on the Saturday night when he had to conduct the orchestra...I explained to him a few days earlier that I was sorry I couldn't come to see his performance on the weekend as I was going to the game...he turned to my wife and in all seriousness said to her...can't we cancel the concert...or postpone it until Sunday night...I wanna go to the match with Nels....


well...if looks could kill.....555

[Dupree]

I would imagine the invite was for a sophisticated dinner around a table talking politics, religion and the current price for a ST..555

If you watch the game during dinner it is not a "dinner". It's a casual playoff party. And you will be screaming at the TV...555 If the hosts could change the name of the invite to that. Then yes...

[Bacon]

I'm in the ask before you go camp. That way you can come up with some last minute gastro or migraine and stay home.

[chelski]

Most of my mates have Foxtel that shows the English Premier League games, and you do not have to ask for it to be put on if we go round, as they will just put it on without being asked and leave wives and GF's talking in the lounge.

In 2003 when England were playing Australia in the Rugby Union Final in Sydney, my GF decides to tell me on the Saturday Morning of the game, that she is having friends round Saturday Night for Dinner here in Perth. I could not believe it, we had been watching all the games upto the final and just could not believe what I was hearing. So just said to her that no problems your friends are coming over but when England win, do not expect me to be there.

So watching the game and gets to that magical moment when Johnny Wilkinson plants his kick between the posts and then the party begins.
She goes home leaving me in the pub celebrating with all my mates. Think I eventually got home just before midnight with bottles of bubbly under my arm, ready for more celebrations just in time to wave all the guests goodby and to get some severe grief from her indoors. But is was all worth it, would not have missed it or the after party for anything in the world.

It was one of those had to be done moments