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Thread: A cautionary tale

  1. #1
    Cadet silver Olympus's Avatar
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    Lightbulb A cautionary tale

    My dad was a good man , a decent hard working man who spent most of his adult life working as as machine operator in the same factory , day after day and year after year he stood at his machine turning out car parts . My mother passed away when she was in her 40’s and dad never married again. As the years rolled by every August bank holiday dad would take his two weeks annual break sitting by the local canal bank fishing . I often said to him , look dad your not short of a few bob , why don’t you go on one of those package holidays to Spain and enjoy your self .

    His stock answer was all ways , stop going on about a holiday , when I retire I’m going to splash out on a cruise on the QE2 .

    Well time just flew by and every year dad sat by the canal bank fishing and life just carried on as normal , when the time eventually came for dad to retire the machine workshop gave him a splendid send off and his parting words to all his mates was , well lads I’ll send you a post card from the QE2.

    Dad started his well earned retirement at 65 and one of the first things he did was to go into town and pop into a travel agents to see about his dream cruise . We both spent many hours pouring over the QE2 brochure and planning which package he would like to go on .

    As normal on Sunday I went to see dad at his council bungalow , as I put my key into the front door lock I shouted , dad its only me .

    I found dad lying in bed , the QE2 brochure on the bed side table along with a hand written list of all the things he was going to buy and take on the cruise . According to the medical report he had passed away in his sleep due to lung problems brought on by years of heavy smoking .

    He worked hard for years and after mum passed away , never really took a proper holiday again ,instead saving all his money for his dream retirement cruise . He retired at 65 and died at 66 .
    Last edited by Olympus; 5th March 2017 at 09:57. Reason: spelling
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  2. #2
    Organic AI Quarky's Avatar
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    I know too many people like that.... planning so much for the future they forget to live for today... and likewise many who don't think of the future at all...

    That's a real sad story though Olympus... I warned my dad it would happen to him... bastard smoked and drinked his way thru life.. had throat cancer... but like a cockroach is still here... sort of.. with dementia...
    My only experience was in a pie making factory managing the gravy team


  3. #3
    Cadet silver Olympus's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Distantpeak View Post
    I know too many people like that.... planning so much for the future they forget to live for today... and likewise many who don't think of the future at all...

    That's a real sad story though Olympus... I warned my dad it would happen to him... bastard smoked and drinked his way thru life.. had throat cancer... but like a cockroach is still here... sort of.. with dementia...

    Cockroach with dementia , I can't get that out of my mind

  4. #4
    Organic AI Quarky's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Olympus View Post
    Cockroach with dementia , I can't get that out of my mind
    Proves at least you don't have dementia then.. 55
    My only experience was in a pie making factory managing the gravy team


  5. #5
    Uber Star Soi wanderer Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน MarcTwoSix's Avatar
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    But the thing is.......A lot of people are just as happy not doing anything or venturing too far.

    I think is who travel get a bit up our own ass that we know better than all that don't travel.

    And, of course, I love travelling, and feel they are missing out but a lot of them aren't missing out. They are perfectly happy in their little world.

    My BIL was the #1 cop in Massachusetts. Retired, then became chief of police of Boston University.
    Then last summer NYU offered him an absolute dream job.
    Huge money, paid apartment in NYC and he'd have to go to Dubai, Shanghai and one other great city every year for a few weeks.

    Both my nephew's are older. One out of University, one in.

    It looked perfect for them. Get out of the suburbs and move to NYC and live that life for 3-4 years. I told them, and really believe, it would make them younger.

    Can you believe they looked at the travel as a negative?? They'd be flying 1st class, put up very nice and all expenses paid!
    That's a dream to me!

    But it's just not them.
    They are happy now with him doing contracting work for his business and going down to a strip mall city in Florida every few months.

    But, I'd honestly say, they are one of the happiest couples and love their life.


    So there are many people who just like their life how it is

  6. #6
    Uber Star Soi wanderer Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน Moo Uaon's Avatar
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    mine and my best 2 mates dads were similar. all passed on around 65 yrs.
    FACE YOUR FEARS LIVE YOUR DREAMS

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    Uber Star Soi wanderer Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน Tingtong's Avatar
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    I hedging my bets, Im doing as much as I comfortably can afford now. Because im "retired " early ive got to make sure ive got enough for the next 20 to 30 yrs and not blowing too much now.
    My only extravagance was that I bought my first new car this year , only a Hyundia i 30 but its new 5555
    Retiring early means the goal posts have been moved forward a bit so financial considerations have to be adjusted to the time frame or I could easily run out of money too soon.
    So if I get to 65 I might have a bit of a splurge then .

  8. #8
    Lamai Beach Bum Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน bacwaan's Avatar
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    my old man is about to hit 90...the last time i saw him he had a brochure on his coffee table for a new Mercedes S500....he already owns one which is about 3 years old...I asked him why he had the brochure when he had the same car in the garage...he said that he was thinking of trading his current one in on anew one as it was getting a bit outdated...I told him he should just go take a look in the mirror

    BTW...he lives right on the water and still takes his boat out fishing pretty much every morning just before sunrise...always manages to catch fish which he cooks for himself for breakfast...he has done this all of his life...even when he was working

    I'm now thinking that he may well out live me...555
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  9. #9
    Foundation Member Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน Sydney's Avatar
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    ^^ wow thats amazing... i always thought just to be capable of still driving at the age of 80 and you are doing well, 90 and you are a rare breed don't you think ?

    Said before i love stories of people still doing stuff at a ripe old age, DP is with me on this one ... If you have time Bac would love to hear any more bits about your Dad, sounds like the type of bloke that could have some stories, i might have to go back to that thread that was started about our upbringings to see if you wrote anything there

    Is it just good genes fro him ? or did he not look after himself and never smoke drink etc
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    The only thing that will stop you from fulfilling your dreams is you.

  10. #10
    Organic AI Quarky's Avatar
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    ^What a great life... catching your own breakfast each day... at 90!!!

    I want that.... or at least be able to do that when I am 90...
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    My only experience was in a pie making factory managing the gravy team


  11. #11
    Uber Star Soi wanderer Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน Moo Uaon's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Distantpeak View Post
    ^What a great life... catching your own breakfast each day... at 90!!!
    whatever floats yer boat...!
    FACE YOUR FEARS LIVE YOUR DREAMS

  12. #12
    Lamai Beach Bum Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน bacwaan's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sydney View Post

    Is it just good genes from him ? or did he not look after himself and never smoke drink etc
    I think he inherited pretty good genes..his Mum lived until 93..Dad late 80's

    He was a light smoker and heavy drinker when young but gave away the cigs in his early 30's...he only ever smoked when he drank (same me) but he was definitely a binge drinker...i always thought of him as a functioning alcoholic TBH...in his late 40's he gave away booze altogether and that lasted a good 10-15 years...since then he has been a moderate drinker...just a glass or two of wine or a couple of light beers a few times a week with dinner

    He was sporty and fit when young and never seems to put on weight...he has worked all of his life as a design engineer...he's still actively engaged in managing his own rental properties but I don't think he has been involved in any new housing developments for 7-8 years or so...certainly since my Mum passed about 4 years ago (they were the same age)

    He has traveled the world extensively. is an avid reader and has always been interested in healthy eating (my mother was fanatical) and the next new thing...we write regularly on email. has his own FB account and he can use excel and other programs pretty well...he is pretty attached to UTA (University of the Third Age) and still attends and gives lectures etc on a regular basis

    I guess active mind/active body has worked for him over time
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  13. #13
    Foundation Member Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน Sydney's Avatar
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    ^^... Sounds like he has also has had a reasonable balance in life ... everything in moderation and nothing to excessive for extended periods ... ie heavy drinking all your life

    Great stuff and thanks ... i always gain inspiration from little stories like this
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    The only thing that will stop you from fulfilling your dreams is you.

  14. #14
    ประเทศไทยเพื่อน Founding Member Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน Changone's Avatar
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    Last night I watched an old (2003) movie called "Second hand lions" with Michael Caine and Robert Duvall, two of my favourite actors. About two brothers and how they lived, through the eyes of their young nephew. Well worth it for the laughs alone.
    They left a "Will" on a scrap of paper which said "The kid gets the lot, plant us in the garden somewhere".
    The movie was full of examples of how you should live as a man should and die with your boots on.
    Also how it doesn't really take that much to make you happy, like the Lion they bought who was happy in his "Jungle" even if it was only a small cornfield. He died as he attacked an intruder trying to harm the boy. The kid says "He has a smile on his face". That's how I want to go out, with someone left behind saying just that.

    And re your old man Olympus? Sure he never made the big cruise, and a man deserves some kind of retirement after a life's hard work. Of course I couldn't ever know........but I would be willing to bet, he enjoyed every second of that time he had fishing in the canal...
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  15. #15
    Cadet silver Olympus's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Changone View Post
    Last night I watched an old (2003) movie called "Second hand lions" with Michael Caine and Robert Duvall, two of my favourite actors. About two brothers and how they lived, through the eyes of their young nephew. Well worth it for the laughs alone.
    They left a "Will" on a scrap of paper which said "The kid gets the lot, plant us in the garden somewhere".
    The movie was full of examples of how you should live as a man should and die with your boots on.
    Also how it doesn't really take that much to make you happy, like the Lion they bought who was happy in his "Jungle" even if it was only a small cornfield. He died as he attacked an intruder trying to harm the boy. The kid says "He has a smile on his face". That's how I want to go out, with someone left behind saying just that.

    And re your old man Olympus? Sure he never made the big cruise, and a man deserves some kind of retirement after a life's hard work. Of course I couldn't ever know........but I would be willing to bet, he enjoyed every second of that time he had fishing in the canal...
    My dad looked forward to his canal fishing trips no matter what the weather , the sad part that really gets me , is remembering him showing me his post office savings book and how the balance was slowly growing towards paying for his retirement dream cruise . Being a widower he lived all alone until his death , in a small rented council bungalow and really never splashed out on any thing , other than a new radio set up ( ham radio ) and his daily packets of Park Drive cigarettes . While he was working , there was so much he could have afforded to do , but saving for his future retirement was the only priority in his mind.


    I wonder if my dad would have known the saying ... carpe diem
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