Phuket Taxi and Transfers

Page 1 of 6 123 ... LastLast
Results 1 to 20 of 102

Thread: New to having relationship with TG

  1. #1
    SAmineworker
    Guest

    New to having relationship with TG

    Hi all

    I have been in a relationship with a TG (and yes she is also a BG) from Patong. We are planning of visiting her village in the new year.
    i have so many questions and not a lot of answers. My brain feels like it is about to explode.
    How did other guys feel when they first started trying to build a successful relationship......

  2. #2
    ประเทศไทยเพื่อน Founding Member Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน PatongBeachBoy's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2011
    Location
    Melbourne, Victoria, Australia
    Posts
    4,407
    Foremost.... that it was the right decision to embark on, never felt so sure about something in my life....
    Well that was until I got home...
    Friends and Family were the worst doubters I came across, even had a mate call me a fool who has a TW.... I learnt very quickly to keep my thoughts close to my chest.
    I then did what your probably doing (joining a few forums) and like you started to read the horror stories.... I was lucky enough to come across a few threads from the likes of Sydney and Wabbit that made me realise that 1. these horror stories do exist 2. most of these horror stories are created!....
    I think an important thing to realise and BKK Steve touched on it in another thread is that these girls have probably been told that much BS over the years by numerous punters that their horror stories would make our horror stories sound like fairy tales....

    In my experience and most of the members here, a relationship with a TG can't be half hearted, they don't have time for another Falang BS artist....
    Travel is the only thing you buy that makes you richer.

  3. #3
    Uber Star Soi wanderer Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน justcruzing1's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2011
    Location
    Nth Brisbane Qld Aust.
    Posts
    12,732
    ^^^ Agree with PBB, also you need to understend initialy, money is everything, love grows later.
    As you learn more about Thai culture, you will learn that the girls are expected to provide for the parent's and other family members. The daughters are their superanuation.

    I have fallen for 2 BG's from Patt's, bought the first one home here for 2 months, best 2 months of my life, but then I hit financial trouble, still have so I am not a candidate for any TG or BG.

    I and all BM's will tell you, a long distance relationship is sooo soo hard, but if you both are honest with each other, and want the same thing, then work hard at it and it can work.

    One other thing, what is your age, and what is hers? age difference doesn't matter in SEA but it does show if there is maturity on both sides.
    Last edited by justcruzing1; 29th November 2012 at 16:30.
    "Of course you love me darling, I handsome man 55555"

  4. #4
    SAmineworker
    Guest
    thanks PBB...... yes the horror stories have created the second guessing going on in my mind. I think it's come down to believing and what will be will be. I will continue to study as much as I can about the thai culture and communicate with her as much as I can.
    PS - i'm sure that BKK steve is excatly right, how much BS have the girls been told.
    PSS - I need to adopt more of the Mai Ben Rai thinking

  5. #5
    ประเทศไทยเพื่อน Founding Member Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน PatongBeachBoy's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2011
    Location
    Melbourne, Victoria, Australia
    Posts
    4,407
    Some of the main pitfalls that I experienced.... The not knowing syndrome, why isn't she answering her phone... I can see that she's online but not talking to me... I know she finished work 2 hours ago and she hasn't called me, etc etc
    There are many answers to these questions but it's human nature to think the worse.... train your thoughts!....

    Money can be a big issue..... set a limit to yourself on what you feel is manageable and reasonable.
    They will be getting pressure left right and centre for money and the best option as well as the easiest will become you..... be straight up with her... I'll send you x amount per week, fortnight or month because that's all I can afford... you can ask me honey but don't be upset when I have to say no.

    And just remember It's all out of your hands... sitting back in SA while she's in LOS is your reality and this won't change... the time you spend together is the important thing, make the most of it and make your time apart as minimal as possible.
    Travel is the only thing you buy that makes you richer.

  6. #6
    SAmineworker
    Guest
    thanks PBB & justcruising
    I hearing what you both are saying and i'm letting it soak in. I've been at reading forums and other sites all day, so need to let the brain rest for now
    Just cruising - there is a age difference which has worried me and TG says it doesnt worry her. When i am there in new year, certainly plan to try and sit down and work out a lot more.
    I was taking a lot of reassurance in the fact that she wants to take me to meet parents and son until reading on another site that some girls will do this to several falangs with there parents being in on it. as i said in another post, i got to take the Mai ben Rai attitude a lot more. Do what i can do from here and see what happens

  7. #7
    Uber Star Soi wanderer Uber Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน Nomad's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2012
    Location
    lOZt
    Posts
    2,621
    So, you work in the mines, pollute the environment, steal my resources, don't pay enough tax. Just joking, but trying to illustrate that a job doesn't define you as a human being. One's occupation may provide an insight into values, motivations and personality, or it may not.

    By the way, your post doesn't indicate that you are passing any judgement, but I am sure you know from what you have read elsewhere that many will make superficial judgements. My view is that it is a bad reflection on them, rather than the TG that they make such judgements based on their work.

    Keep an open and independent mind, but keep your eyes open. Good luck.
    Last edited by Nomad; 29th November 2012 at 17:12.
    "Don't wait around for your life to happen to you. Find something that makes you happy and do it. Everything else is just background noise." George Mason

  8. #8
    ประเทศไทยเพื่อน Founding Member Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน Changone's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2011
    Location
    .
    Posts
    12,399
    Quote Originally Posted by SAmineworker View Post
    Hi all

    I have been in a relationship with a TG (and yes she is also a BG) from Patong. We are planning of visiting her village in the new year.
    i have so many questions and not a lot of answers. My brain feels like it is about to explode.
    How did other guys feel when they first started trying to build a successful relationship......
    Best I can tell you is that I felt the same way. I hope it makes you feel a bit less like you are alone with this. Don't rush things and go with the flow. The family thing is real important, but keep it real and try to remain calm.
    And where the hell was Biggles.....?....when you needed him last Saturday....?

  9. #9
    Uber Star Soi wanderer Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน justcruzing1's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2011
    Location
    Nth Brisbane Qld Aust.
    Posts
    12,732
    SA,
    To help you, we really do ned to know more about you and her.
    How long have you spent together?
    How did you meet?
    Age difference...
    Where is she from?

    Don't get me wrong, and we don't judge here, my first TG was 32 I was 55, she had 2 kids, etc. was aBG in Patt's.

    The thing is, the more we know, the more we can advise on possibe speed humps and how to avoid them.

    We all have to go thru the experience's but some can go easler than others.
    "Of course you love me darling, I handsome man 55555"

  10. #10
    Guest Platinum daohoshi Dao's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2012
    Posts
    867
    Quote Originally Posted by SAmineworker View Post
    Hi all

    I have been in a relationship with a TG (and yes she is also a BG) from Patong. We are planning of visiting her village in the new year.
    i have so many questions and not a lot of answers. My brain feels like it is about to explode.
    How did other guys feel when they first started trying to build a successful relationship......
    Not a guy because I am Thai Girl that is an Aussie. 5555 Step by step. So we can help you. You understand meeting mum and dad?

  11. #11
    SAmineworker
    Guest
    thaks everybody, i'll try to answer the best i can
    met in June thuis year
    met in the bar, though she wasnt working and i thought (naively) that she was hanging with friends who did... second i worked out that she worked there.. and no it doesnt bother me in the least
    age difference = 22 years
    assian - Si Sa Ket prov

    I am struggling and trying to push past negative thoughts... i want this to be true but i am still condition to western things and want direct answers to direct questions and i know that what happen. Language is a huge barrier and i am trying hard to learn. i understand that she has probably heard it all before from other falangs, so i dont blame her in the least for being guarded, but how do i get pass this???
    I have told her i will look after her son n her family and her to the best of my ability. I dont care about her past, mine isnt the best but there are certain things i cant change, i.e. to earn good money i must work away from home in mining.
    Sorry for Rabbling guys, the head in ready to explode, hope you understand....
    all this from a guy who swore black n blue before meeting BG that he had not the slightest interest in asian girls n i didnt....
    Rich

  12. #12
    Foundation Member Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน Minder's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2011
    Location
    Perth , Australia
    Age
    59
    Posts
    3,512
    Quote Originally Posted by SAmineworker View Post
    Hi all

    I have been in a relationship with a TG (and yes she is also a BG) from Patong. We are planning of visiting her village in the new year.
    i have so many questions and not a lot of answers. My brain feels like it is about to explode.
    How did other guys feel when they first started trying to build a successful relationship......
    If you have only met her on one trip and she is taking you to meet Mama and Papa I would advise caution .. as Dao will explain, it is a BIG THING in real Thai culture ... a BG taking a punter home to the village on his second trip to Thailand ... well, the ex-Pattaya BG who lives across the road from Mrs M and I tells a great story about the successful Patts BG who would "rent" elderly poverty stricken couples in her village to play her Mama and Papa so she could avoid taking her latest farang "BF" anywhere near her own family's mansion...

    Age gap IS an issue ... just not as big an issue as in farangland ... 10-20 years is fine IMHO ... even more if the girl is over 30 ... a young BG looking to hook up with you or me after one trip .. and telling me she loves me and misses me .... good customer service sure ... love? I'd just have to look in the mirror to answer that one.

    As PBB said most of the horror stories are created .... usually by the farang ... who refuses to listen or see ...

    Pardon the tough love approach but this is the only thread of yours I have read ... you have not said enough to help me to help you at this stage ......you may feel you are calling the shots but the more experienced here will react to your story much the same way we would on seeing a small child approach a pit-bull...

    Enjoy...
    Life is the unexpected ...

  13. #13
    SAmineworker
    Guest
    yes i understand meeting the family means but

  14. #14
    Organic AI Quarky's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2011
    Posts
    51,096
    Just remember, with a 22 year age difference, your emotional connection to the relationship is going to be vastly different to hers. Moreso if she is under 30. In time your emotional connection will become more sophisticated... as you find a common emotional bond. Just ask the others here, but that will take years, not weeks or months. As long as you have accepted that and comprehend it you will find the process a whole lot easier.

    Take note of Minder's wise words. Be wary of a village visit so soon after knowing her.
    Last edited by Quarky; 29th November 2012 at 23:58.
    My only experience was in a pie making factory managing the gravy team


  15. #15
    SAmineworker
    Guest
    Quote Originally Posted by Minder View Post
    If you have only met her on one trip and she is taking you to meet Mama and Papa I would advise caution .. as Dao will explain, it is a BIG THING in real Thai culture ... a BG taking a punter home to the village on his second trip to Thailand ... well, the ex-Pattaya BG who lives across the road from Mrs M and I tells a great story about the successful Patts BG who would "rent" elderly poverty stricken couples in her village to play her Mama and Papa so she could avoid taking her latest farang "BF" anywhere near her own family's mansion...

    Age gap IS an issue ... just not as big an issue as in farangland ... 10-20 years is fine IMHO ... even more if the girl is over 30 ... a young BG looking to hook up with you or me after one trip .. and telling me she loves me and misses me .... good customer service sure ... love? I'd just have to look in the mirror to answer that one.

    As PBB said most of the horror stories are created .... usually by the farang ... who refuses to listen or see ...

    Pardon the tough love approach but this is the only thread of yours I have read ... you have not said enough to help me to help you at this stage ......you may feel you are calling the shots but the more experienced here will react to your story much the same way we would on seeing a small child approach a pit-bull...

    Enjoy...
    No thank you Minder, i love the direct approach, or tough love approach whatever people want to call it.

    It will be third visit in over 6 months, and though i thought i was just taking her to village so she could meet her son, I now understand that it is a lot more than that
    please dont apolozie, the alarm bells have been ringing for me
    Like she gets upset if i talk with anybosdy contected to her. A male (falang) friend married to her friend added me on facebook and we have been talking, she got very upset about this. I undertand that she wouldn't like me talking to other BG's but another falang????
    I want to do this right thing and help her and her son and her family but i feel that she has heard this all before? I am already sending her money (no, she never has asked for money), i sent off my bat and I have asked her on numerous if she needs more money..... can you see why i am conflicted?
    Again for any help, feel like i tap dancing through a mine field..... 555555

  16. #16
    SAmineworker
    Guest
    please do not hesitate to contact me directly, i am so seeking any help i can get.......

  17. #17
    Foundation Member Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน Sydney's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2011
    Location
    Sydney Australia
    Posts
    7,100
    SA its only early days yet mate....try not to think to much, go and enjoy your trip in the new year, meet the family, get to know your lady more and then the picture may get a little clearer for you.

    Are you on Skype at all? is she computer savy and can you chat her....if so try and put some hours in when ever possible this way so learn some more about her.

    Don't go sending money to her to quickly....if she starts asking to much for money now, then TBH that's not a great sign.

    Just take it easy, sit back and think and watch more about what moves she is making, put your detective hat on, but dont get paranoid it will just do your head in.
    The only thing that will stop you from fulfilling your dreams is you.

  18. #18
    Organic AI Quarky's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2011
    Posts
    51,096
    ^Please stop sending the money! One of the best ways to lose her respect.
    My only experience was in a pie making factory managing the gravy team


  19. #19
    Foundation Member Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน Minder's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2011
    Location
    Perth , Australia
    Age
    59
    Posts
    3,512
    Also ... no one is trying to talk you out of the relationship ... there are rules and you need to understand them .... rule one is relax .... do you like being with her? Does she treat you better than any other woman ever has? Do you have to wipe that silly smirk off your face every time you think about her? .... Is she still costing you less money than a not-even-first-base date would have in the West?
    Relax.
    Even if it all eventually comes to nothing this will still be the most fun you ever had making a mistake .... You have found Thailand now .... life can only get better and better...
    Where will you find another girl like her ?? .....Oh wait, there she is ... and there and there ....
    Life is the unexpected ...

  20. #20
    Uber Star Soi wanderer Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน meese's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2011
    Posts
    5,556
    not sure if you mentioned if she is still working the bar??...imho..its way to early to go and meet her parents...give it more time...and as distantpeak say's stop sending money...then see what the reaction is..good luck

Page 1 of 6 123 ... LastLast

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •