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Thread: Farangs, Love & Money

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    ประเทศไทยเพื่อน Founding Member Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน Changone's Avatar
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    Last edited by Changone; 30th April 2013 at 23:01.

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    The artist formally known as Wabbits Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน wabbits's Avatar
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    Good question what makes a guy sponsor?
    What is the difference between looking after a loved one and sponsorship?

    Sponsorship in this context seems to be I will give you money and for this I expect you not to sleep with anyone else (exclusive). Seems to be the vogue for Bgs but not just only.
    I see no love involved with this relationship just an arrangement as a man may keep a mistress here in the west, all be it at a discount rate.
    What happens when the money stops? She says Mai ben rai or does she go back to her previous profession and look to establish a similar arrangement again.

    I can understand a guy keeping a mistress but sponsoring a girl in this style of relationship in an other country??

    Looking after a loved one is similar to a degree and I will talk about myself. Mrs W has been in village and I have been sending money. Sponsorship? No! How we get to this point is the difference there are very few similarities to my mind.
    She never asked I offered. It did not happen until we committed. I saw no point in her working in LOS when what I might spend on beer was enough for her to not work in LOS. Point to note this is not a long term thing just while she is there and waiting and then when in OZ will be happy to work. Also we have spent more time together than apart anyway.

    On TG's and money I dont think they are any different to any other girl from around the world maybe just clearer in their communication about money after all it is the oil that runs any relationship (try have one with no money see how far you get)

    Christians and money...easy for the preist to stand up the fron of a church and preach about you not needing money in love...while he preaches this with guilt in one hand and the collection plate in the other.
    .

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    ประเทศไทยเพื่อน Founding Member Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน PatongBeachBoy's Avatar
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    This is text book psychology...... women need to feel love while men want to feel needed.... pure and simple.... so it is natural for a man to become a sponsor

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    Uber Star Soi wanderer Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน justcruzing1's Avatar
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    I do think, Thai girls in general, sorry BG's, have very little control of their money, they are not good with it.

    If they have some, and a friend or family haven't, they give it to them, regardless that they may have none soon and in the same position as those they helped out. BG's think, it's ok, they just go back to bar and get it all again. This is ok while young and in demand, but as they get older times flys and they get less interest, and more desperate.

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    The artist formally known as Wabbits Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน wabbits's Avatar
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    How many single girls here in Oz under 30 are good with there money they may not give it to friends.
    but shoes, clothes, mobile phones etc get most of it.....*Cha Ching*
    .

  6. #6
    ประเทศไทยเพื่อน Founding Member Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน Changone's Avatar
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    I think there is so much more to it than simply saying girls are the same anywhere and it is all simple psychology.
    Looking at "Sponsorship" in isolation gives you a false impression of what is going on if you regard every arrangement as a (Loveless) contract on both sides.

    Most Farang see the amount of money they need to pay to replace a regular wage in Thailand as very small compared to what they earn at home so it makes logical sense to them not to have someone work for what they see as less than worthwhile money.
    Unfortunately, this is also going to be seen as a minor consideration as far as a TG is concerned. Paying a TG the same basic amount of money as she could otherwise earn won't work for long. She will get bored of sitting at home and try to earn more, no matter what line of work she is in. Ask most TG's if they would keep working if someone gave them a sizable lump sum of money and they will say yes.

    The other thing Farang want for their money is "Exclusivity" It may work for a short while, but if there is no love involved you will never be able to rule it in permanently.
    If the Farang has not promised his TG anything more than a few weeks a year together, plus or minus a tourist trip to his home country, she will be looking for a better offer, no doubt about it. (I know I would!)

    So it's still true, Money can't buy you love.

    Sponsorship from a Farang point of view is mostly driven by emotion, (Often equated with love), and the primal male need to capture and hold a dream which exceeds his expectations, primarily in the physical sense.

    What say you fellow dreamers?
    And where the hell was Biggles.....?....when you needed him last Saturday....?

  7. #7
    The artist formally known as Wabbits Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน wabbits's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Changone View Post
    I think there is so much more to it than simply saying girls are the same anywhere and it is all simple psychology.
    Looking at "Sponsorship" in isolation gives you a false impression of what is going on if you regard every arrangement as a (Loveless) contract on both sides.

    Most Farang see the amount of money they need to pay to replace a regular wage in Thailand as very small compared to what they earn at home so it makes logical sense to them not to have someone work for what they see as less than worthwhile money.
    Unfortunately, this is also going to be seen as a minor consideration as far as a TG is concerned. Paying a TG the same basic amount of money as she could otherwise earn won't work for long. She will get bored of sitting at home and try to earn more, no matter what line of work she is in. Ask most TG's if they would keep working if someone gave them a sizable lump sum of money and they will say yes.

    The other thing Farang want for their money is "Exclusivity" It may work for a short while, but if there is no love involved you will never be able to rule it in permanently.
    If the Farang has not promised his TG anything more than a few weeks a year together, plus or minus a tourist trip to his home country, she will be looking for a better offer, no doubt about it. (I know I would!)

    So it's still true, Money can't buy you love.

    Sponsorship from a Farang point of view is mostly driven by emotion, (Often equated with love), and the primal male need to capture and hold a dream which exceeds his expectations, primarily in the physical sense.

    What say you fellow dreamers?
    I see no point to sponsoring in its most ofter seen form. Its like paying for a camp site all year round for your annual 2 week holiday!!
    But maybe we fail to see to the heart of things.
    Maybe there is more to it.
    Nightly calls, someone to chat with and plan with for holidays.
    Having someone they know will be there to look after then when they come for there annual Thai stay.

    I think many relationships develop from sponsorship but is this the way that would be ideal for a strong lasting relationship??

    I dont think you can separate love and money they are all just parts of the whole.
    After all money was what got you to LOS in the first place without money most Farangs would never meet a Thai girl.
    No money and your going out with a bogan chick call Shandell who rolles her own tampons.........
    .

  8. #8
    ประเทศไทยเพื่อน Founding Member Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน PatongBeachBoy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by wabbits View Post
    No money and your going out with a bogan chick call Shandell who rolles her own tampons.........
    I'll make sure I work harder tomorrow!

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    The artist formally known as Wabbits Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน wabbits's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by PatongBeachBoy View Post
    I'll make sure I work harder tomorrow!
    The weedy little guys with mullets seem to love their over sizes bogan moles....but it is good motivation to work 55555
    .

  10. #10
    ประเทศไทยเพื่อน Founding Member Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน PatongBeachBoy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by wabbits View Post
    The weedy little guys with mullets seem to love their over sizes bogan moles....
    I might start with a rats tale

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    ประเทศไทยเพื่อน Founding Member Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน Arliss Michaels's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Changone View Post
    There was an old song by Warren Zevon called "Lawyers Guns & Money".
    "I was hiding in Honduras...I'm a desperate man...Said Lawyers Guns & Money.....The $hit has hit the fan...!"
    Good to see another Warren Zevon fan on the board, was a very underrated singer songwriter as is another fave of mine Stan Ridgway

    The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese

  12. #12
    Mrs M.
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    Quote Originally Posted by wabbits View Post
    How many single girls here in Oz under 30 are good with there money they may not give it to friends.
    but shoes, clothes, mobile phones etc get most of it.....*Cha Ching*
    Anything come easy, go easy. Is that seem familiar ^)(^ lets just focus on the money.

    I have a couples of stories to share:

    1#
    There was once I brought along my TG neighbour to a friend's place. We took bus and train. But bummer I forgot (not often use the train) and told ther bus driver to go to the train station, it cost $2.70 each or something for a standard, and then when we get to the train station we have to get another tickets for the train another $2.70, so end up its $5.20 instead of $3.70, if I told the bus driver that we want to go "the destination" its only a short ride.

    I just said to the girl that if it would save us a the money if I just told the driver correctly. She said do worry about it only nit noi money. But from what I felt she did not try to make me feel better but she really think that its just little money. Why bother talk about it.

    2#
    That was the New Year time in Pattaya. There were 4 or five or us, Me Mr M. and a Farang+Thai gf, and a farang man,

    We were eatting in Soi Bua Khao. I can't remember the restaurant name but I can see it in my mind. We ordered enough food. I ordered what I like, Mr M. ordered his and other order what they wanted. We enjoyed it very much, great food, good price.

    The table next to us, there were 2 Bar girls and their customers, they talk alot these two men but I did not get a word. Not English, I asked Mr. M, but can't remember now what they were. I never leave food to go waste. I always eat all my food. I love food. So I was scraping my plate 555, whats the matter its my plate. ^_& (sorry Mr M. to embarassing you 55)

    And then there is a un-welcome voice come with the win and got in my left ear but is stay there would not go through the right one haha, that "nii khor knee niew jing" in Thai. i thought what??? and realize later that ahh she prabably mean i am Knee niew with food, eat them all but they have too much too eat, left alot of food wasted and I guest because they are not paying for it and greeding. Order too much.

    I was angry a first, but then kind of think of its as a funny thing. And thought because you are like this, think like this. Thats why you are here, working as a XXX.


    The End. >_<


    In my opinion, they used to of getting money easily so they spend it easily as well.

  13. #13
    Uber Star Soi wanderer Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน justcruzing1's Avatar
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    "but they have too much too eat, left alot of food wasted and I guest because they are not paying for it and greeding. Order too much."

    Mrs M, you have a great insight.

    I found the same thing, when I took BG for food, they always ordered several dishes, never able to finish them.

    Jeab was one of only two that didn't, and generaly ordered cheap meals, and only one plus rice for two of us.

    I would have to say, I think this is a very good measure of who you are seeing.

    I might add this trend continued, for all the times I have had with her, both inThai and here in Aust. Mind you when they get together after Temple, the amount of food they can eat!! I would say it's also the same at a buffet, or when they have a party.

  14. #14
    Mrs M.
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    Quote Originally Posted by wabbits View Post
    Good question what makes a guy sponsor?
    What is the difference between looking after a loved one and sponsorship?

    Sponsorship in this context seems to be I will give you money and for this I expect you not to sleep with anyone else (exclusive). Seems to be the vogue for Bgs but not just only.
    I see no love involved with this relationship just an arrangement as a man may keep a mistress here in the west, all be it at a discount rate.
    What happens when the money stops? She says Mai ben rai or does she go back to her previous profession and look to establish a similar arrangement again.

    I can understand a guy keeping a mistress but sponsoring a girl in this style of relationship in an other country??

    Looking after a loved one is similar to a degree and I will talk about myself. Mrs W has been in village and I have been sending money. Sponsorship? No! How we get to this point is the difference there are very few similarities to my mind.
    She never asked I offered. It did not happen until we committed. I saw no point in her working in LOS when what I might spend on beer was enough for her to not work in LOS. Point to note this is not a long term thing just while she is there and waiting and then when in OZ will be happy to work. Also we have spent more time together than apart anyway.

    On TG's and money I dont think they are any different to any other girl from around the world maybe just clearer in their communication about money after all it is the oil that runs any relationship (try have one with no money see how far you get)

    Christians and money...easy for the preist to stand up the fron of a church and preach about you not needing money in love...while he preaches this with guilt in one hand and the collection plate in the other.
    you said it Wabbits>_<

    And to the thread starter, very good Mixture! very true! lets face it....This is life...^_&

    As I am a girl here. I will say from my point of view 555, its easier..

    Well I think I am a okay looking girl ^_^ but very strange why I did not have many BFs 555.

    I finished a certificated degree at first, and started working for a year and then do the deploma afterwork, and then after that a few years do the bachalor degree on the weekend. Its look like I spent alot of my time there, not count that my family is a very conservative family.

    I think love, and suitable come together, work, social, money is all in there And not only International love, for Thai couples as well. So I always look at some one in my sight, same social with me, talk the same language with me (well look like I missed this one ^_^)., I kind of wanted to look up higher but in this new generation there is no more Cinderella story, well just leave The princess Mary alone. She is a specail one.

    From what I did, I never let the relationship start if I see that its not what I want., and I am lucky that I am not a pretty girl. And it was kind of self defense too. I know I am not pretty, so I never give anyone a chance to look at me with no respect.

    I sound like a cold robot don't I, but when a robot love you, it last for life time ^)(^

    I just did not want to make a mistake, I told myself I will Love with brain and will
    never learn from my mistake, I will learn from other people mistake.

    One of my younger sister is in has a bf and I am trying to tell her that it will not work "love with no money, no education, no job" buddha help me. he got nothing ! sigh...but she will have to learn for herself. We only can do so much (Mr M. said)

    I just hope she got my message that she in love with a dreamer very soon, oh buddha (again) he is one of us 5555, nah he like to do his own business...start here and realize its not working, stop and go to dig a new hole and then notice that nothing here, and start new thing again. I see many of this kind of people.

    There is no love with out money - it will not survive for real for long. I have seen many of stories, my friends, and people i know, etc.

    So for this mixture, "Farang, Love and Money" in my opinion it always have to be together, can not missing any part.

  15. #15
    ประเทศไทยเพื่อน Founding Member Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน PatongBeachBoy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mrs M. View Post


    There is no love with out money - it will not survive for real for long. I have seen many of stories, my friends, and people i know, etc.

    So for this mixture, "Farang, Love and Money" in my opinion it always have to be together, can not missing any part.
    wow..... you surprise me with this

  16. #16
    The artist formally known as Wabbits Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน wabbits's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by PatongBeachBoy View Post
    wow..... you surprise me with this
    So true but when we are honest with ourselves.
    How do you feel about yourself when you dont have enough?
    .

  17. #17
    ประเทศไทยเพื่อน Founding Member Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน PatongBeachBoy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by wabbits View Post
    So true but when we are honest with ourselves.
    How do you feel about yourself when you dont have enough?
    like a capitalist who has strayed far from a former person I once was...... had a moment today TBO looking at a plasma tv catalogue.... wondering where the person has gone who once could fit his worldly possesions in a back pack......

  18. #18
    Uber Star Soi wanderer Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน justcruzing1's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by wabbits View Post
    So true but when we are honest with ourselves.
    How do you feel about yourself when you dont have enough?
    Starts with self doubt, no self love, so how can you believe someone else can love you when you don't love yourself? why, because you feel like you have failed, or blown it.

    It doesn't matter what people say, or think, you, in the deepest part of your mind hate yourself for what you are, have become, due to your own mistakes, or others actions. You know where you think you should be, and it is like a giant mental brick. Your in a swimming pool with this giant brick, and you don't feel like you can swim against it.

    Don't get this wrong, I some years ago, in the dark depths, attempted suicide twice. I also was clinicly dead at 10, from Incefilitis, and went to the "White Light' . was in a coma for 8 months.

    Just know what it feels like to think everything has stuffed up.

  19. #19
    Foundation Member Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน Minder's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mrs M. View Post
    There is no love with out money - it will not survive for real for long. I have seen many of stories, my friends, and people i know, etc.

    So for this mixture, "Farang, Love and Money" in my opinion it always have to be together, can not missing any part.
    Quote Originally Posted by PatongBeachBoy View Post
    wow..... you surprise me with this
    I have to admit I was a little stunned myself the first time she explained that had I not passed the financial "due diligence inspection" early on - then no matter what she felt for me or how great a guy I was (and hey, we all know how awsowe I am) - then our relationship was going nowhere.

    I will admit that it hurt my feelings then to think she could turn off so easily. It seemed so cold - so mercenary.

    I have since come to realise that Thais know that real life is not Hollywood - love alone is not enough to put rice on the table.

    The harsh reality of poverty in Thailand is too harsh and too real to risk it.

    Enjoy
    Life is the unexpected ...

  20. #20
    The artist formally known as Wabbits Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน wabbits's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by justcruzing1 View Post
    Starts with self doubt, no self love, so how can you believe someone else can love you when you don't love yourself? why, because you feel like you have failed, or blown it.

    It doesn't matter what people say, or think, you, in the deepest part of your mind hate yourself for what you are, have become, due to your own mistakes, or others actions. You know where you think you should be, and it is like a giant mental brick. Your in a swimming pool with this giant brick, and you don't feel like you can swim against it.

    Don't get this wrong, I some years ago, in the dark depths, attempted suicide twice. I also was clinicly dead at 10, from Incefilitis, and went to the "White Light' . was in a coma for 8 months.

    Just know what it feels like to think everything has stuffed up.
    The trick is to know what is enough and not want more needlessly...................When you work it out tell me 5555
    .

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