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Thread: The GFE. (girlfriend experience)

  1. #161
    Uber Star Soi wanderer Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน Stillearly's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by MarcTwoSix View Post
    If you don't plan on settling down, there are thousands of girls in Thailand, no reason to waste anyone's time
    my thoughts exactly

  2. #162
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    Quote Originally Posted by Stillearly View Post
    my thoughts exactly
    Like a kid in a candy shop, Ian. 555

  3. #163
    ประเทศไทยเพื่อน Founding Member Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน
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    Quote Originally Posted by MarcTwoSix View Post
    Well I do think the onus is on us, as the farang
    They are adults and should be able to understand a clear directive that you are only into a casual relationship
    But a lot of girls are looking for a better life and won't listen to any rationale talk
    If you don't plan on settling down, there is thousands of girls in Thailand, no reason to waste anyone's time
    I hear the rationale and I don't disagree, but to me there is a clear conflict if the onus is on us. (see what i did there...555)
    Call it the "Vanguy Paradox", Thanks DP...555
    Remember the times he said.. "I made it clear to her".. 55.
    That's the prime reason I think you are (in danger at least of) sending mixed messages if you go back for a GFE with the same girl more than once.
    As you rightly say, there ARE thousands of girls to choose from which does indeed beg the question, at least in her mind, "Why her?".
    Last edited by Changone; 19th May 2017 at 17:36.

  4. #164
    Uber Star Soi wanderer Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน RakThai's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Changone View Post
    I hear the rationale and I don't disagree, but to me there is a clear conflict if the onus is on us. (see what i did there...555)
    Call it the "Vanguy Paradox", Thanks DP...555
    That's the prime reason I think you are (in danger at least of) sending mixed messages if you go back for a GFE with the same girl more than once.
    As you rightly say, there ARE thousands of girls to choose from which does indeed beg the question, at least in her mind, "Why her?".
    Yeah, if you enjoyed a good meal in a good restaurant, you may go back once. Not more, because that may raise expectations and severe disappointment if you don't become a regular.. 555

  5. #165
    Uber Star Soi wanderer Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน Stillearly's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by RakThai View Post
    Yeah, if you enjoyed a good meal in a good restaurant, you may go back once. Not more, because that may raise expectations and severe disappointment if you don't become a regular.. 555
    equating steak and chips to peoples feelings , not a fair comparison really
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  6. #166
    Uber Star Soi wanderer Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน RakThai's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Stillearly View Post
    equating steak and chips to peoples feelings , not a fair comparison really
    Of course it's not a fair comparison, nothing is..

    Thing is, people may always get hope or expectations if you are kind, good or generous to them, and may feel disappointed when you don't meet those expectations.
    But that should not be a reason to NOT be good, kind or generous.
    The argument that there are thousands of girls is in my opinion a more "steak and chips" comparison than the equation I made.

  7. #167
    Astrotraveller Distantpeak's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by RakThai View Post
    Of course it's not a fair comparison, nothing is..

    Thing is, people may always get hope or expectations if you are kind, good or generous to them, and may feel disappointed when you don't meet those expectations.
    But that should not be a reason to NOT be good, kind or generous.
    The argument that there are thousands of girls is in my opinion a more "steak and chips" comparison than the equation I made.
    I don't think it's a reason NOT to be good, kind or generous... it's how long you do that before you stop?

    Like starting a job because they say they will pay you 1million a year... only to be told after a week they changed their mind... maybe TGs should make us sign a contract on the first night... if you spend more than 24 hours with me, I am entitled to... etc etc... and steak and chips for life... 55
    Last edited by Distantpeak; 19th May 2017 at 23:13.
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  8. #168
    ประเทศไทยเพื่อน Founding Member Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน
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    Every night is Steak and blowjob night in Thailand then right....?
    Well it is while you are there anyway, after that it's back to rice and noodles for the next 50 weeks...555
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  9. #169
    Lamai Beach Bum Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน bacwaan's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Changone View Post
    Every night is Steak and blowjob night in Thailand then right....?
    Well it is while you are there anyway.....
    Not for me....I rarely ever eat steak...555
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  10. #170
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    Good discussion and rational replies. It really, really depends on the people involved. How many times have you been talking to some bloke who doesn't really listen to what you are saying? He is just waiting to tell you HIS story. I've met many of those types and eventually you just drop them off your list of friends. You listen politely for a little while and then go elsewhere. It is the same thing with many of the women. They only hear what they want to hear and what you say doesn't mean squat.

    Many times in the past I cut off communication with women who wanted more than I was willing to supply. I don't like hurting anyone's feelings... including my own. Right now I am involved with a sick woman who I can never have a proper relationship with, but she needs help and there is nobody else but me. That is why we are all correct in this discussion. A lot depends on the women we choose to associate with... for what ever reason. Stillearly is correct. He picks the "hotties" who have been around and know the story that it's a love-em and leave-em world. Distantpeak and RakThai are also correct because they don't want to get some pretty farm girl's expectation too high when they can't deliver the goods. I'm somewhat in Distantpeak and RakThai's camp because I hate hurting peoples feelings. Fortunately, I'm getting to an age where I couldn't keep up with Stillearly's style, and nor do I want to.

  11. #171
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    Quote Originally Posted by RakThai View Post
    But that should not be a reason to NOT be good, kind or generous.
    you can be all of those if your time together lasts an hour , a night, a week, a month etc ... all depends on the type of person you are.

    Conversely some guys may take girls for LLT for purely selfish reasons , maybe they are after a LLT discount , want a girl on call 24/7 , a cheap guide or maybe they don't want to use a condom so think its a safer way of doing things.
    Last edited by Stillearly; 20th May 2017 at 03:34.
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  12. #172
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    Quote Originally Posted by Stillearly View Post
    you can be all of those if your time together lasts an hour , a night, a week, a month etc ... all depends on the type of person you are.

    Conversely some guys may take girls for LLT for purely selfish reasons , maybe they are after a LLT discount , want a girl on call 24/7 , a cheap guide or maybe they don't want to use a condom so think its a safer way of doing things.
    What are you trying to say, Ian? If you want to argue an issue, feel free to do so..
    But cheap shots and kicks below the belt don't become you..

  13. #173
    Uber Star Soi wanderer Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน Stillearly's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by RakThai View Post
    What are you trying to say, Ian? If you want to argue an issue, feel free to do so..
    But cheap shots and kicks below the belt don't become you..
    you said that guys that LLT are "good, kind and generous" , so by implication taking girls for just one night is not treating them well ...

    I was suggesting they might have selfish reasons, I have seen many threads on forums asking questions about LLT discounts etc , so thought it was a fair comment , what bit don't you agree with ?

  14. #174
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    Quote Originally Posted by Stillearly View Post
    you said that guys that LLT are "good, kind and generous" , so by implication taking girls for just one night is not treating them well ...

    I was suggesting they might have selfish reasons, I have seen many threads on forums asking questions about LLT discounts etc , so thought it was a fair comment , what bit don't you agree with ?
    What I resent is that you take my words out of their context and add some personal insult to it, that comes from another thread, another time and another forum level..

    I was responding to the statement that you should not spent too much time with the same lady because that may raise expectations..
    And my question is why not? If something feels good, their is a good connection and both enjoy the time together?

  15. #175
    Uber Star Soi wanderer Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน MarcTwoSix's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Changone View Post
    I hear the rationale and I don't disagree, but to me there is a clear conflict if the onus is on us. (see what i did there...555)
    Call it the "Vanguy Paradox", Thanks DP...555
    That's the prime reason I think you are (in danger at least of) sending mixed messages if you go back for a GFE with the same girl more than once.
    As you rightly say, there ARE thousands of girls to choose from which does indeed beg the question, at least in her mind, "Why her?".
    I think you have to understand you are dealing with people with feelings.
    And I know I give faranags a lot of shit but sometimes I do think they don't understand that. They think of how great they are treating them and buying them nice dinners, staying in a nice hotel but they are ignoring the fact that they are dealing with a girl, a lot of times, that is looking for a way out so that person's hopes and expectations can be a lot higher than normal.
    And, in a BG case......with a girl that can be a bit immature.

    I do think that most guys, almost all of them actually, that are in a GFE with a girl do truly treat them very well. But they may be ignorant of the girl getting her hopes up.

    It's really understanding the girl and how she can handle it.

    I did that once with a nurse from Bangkok International. I was living there and a bit full of myself, thinking I can get any girl I'm interested in.....it's human nature to think that when in Thailand at times.
    Wrangled a date with the nurse that cleaned my MB injuries.
    Very pretty and had a good time but after 2 dates it was evident she would want more and I just thought it would be unfair to keep seeing her since I didn't want to settle down.
    And to be honest......I think I was more into the fact I "scored a nurse" than the actual girl herself

  16. #176
    Uber Star Soi wanderer Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน Stillearly's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by RakThai View Post
    What I resent is that you take my words out of their context and add some personal insult to it, that comes from another thread, another time and another forum level..

    I was responding to the statement that you should not spent too much time with the same lady because that may raise expectations..
    And my question is why not? If something feels good, their is a good connection and both enjoy the time together?
    I had thought this was the same thread as the P4P and family discussion , my mistake

    nothing is wrong with taking a girl for LLT as long as you both know what you are signing up for , but obviously unless someone has a heart of stone the longer you are together , then the more chance one party will want/hope for more ... I have witnessed a couple of my friends going down that route and so far it hasn't worked out well for either , but I think their expectations were different from the girls
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  17. #177
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    Quote Originally Posted by RakThai View Post
    What are you trying to say, Ian? If you want to argue an issue, feel free to do so..
    But cheap shots and kicks below the belt don't become you..
    That wasn't a cheap shot, Rak. He just stated the same things I do, but from a different perspective. It all depends on the people involved. Many of those "working girls" are anything but a "sweet young thang". They are hard as nails and chew up the nice, newbie punters and spit out the pieces. I would hazard a guess that more punters have had their hearts broken by the working girls than the other way around. Once you've been around for as long as I have then you get to see the whole gambit from A to Z. I've talked many times about the working girls who talk amongst themselves and what they say about certain "customers". Some men they just turn their backs on. I've seen some come back to the bar in tears after taking a week long trip with some guy. And, other times they go with another man and come back with a big smile and excitement in their eyes.
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  18. #178
    Uber Star Soi wanderer Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน RakThai's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Stillearly View Post
    I had thought this was the same thread as the P4P and family discussion , my mistake

    nothing is wrong with taking a girl for LLT as long as you both know what you are signing up for , but obviously unless someone has a heart of stone the longer you are together , then the more chance one party will want/hope for more ... I have witnessed a couple of my friends going down that route and so far it hasn't worked out well for either , but I think their expectations were different from the girls
    And that's just it.. I have seen many friends in my own country doing that long time thing, and it hasn't worked out for most, including myself..
    Relationships rarely last a life time, not in Thailand and not in the rest of the world.
    Being open and honest rarely changes the outcome, but it always reduces the impact..

  19. #179
    Platinum Rockitt's Avatar
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    I guess we are all different. Some of us enjoy ST some LT. Same with the girls. Some are happy to stay longer and others just want to do the deal and get back to the bar.
    There are a few that prefer to do the girlfriend thing, staying for a few days. I've only done this 2 times and really enjoyed it. No discounts offered or expected. In fact the costs were far more in the long run. I think most of these girls enjoy being able to show you their country, their beliefs, and their way of life. I have a genuine interest in all of those things and by going ST you miss out on all that.
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  20. #180
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    Quote Originally Posted by MarcTwoSix View Post
    I think you have to understand you are dealing with people with feelings.
    And I know I give faranags a lot of shit but sometimes I do think they don't understand that. They think of how great they are treating them and buying them nice dinners, staying in a nice hotel but they are ignoring the fact that they are dealing with a girl, a lot of times, that is looking for a way out so that person's hopes and expectations can be a lot higher than normal.
    And, in a BG case......with a girl that can be a bit immature.

    I do think that most guys, almost all of them actually, that are in a GFE with a girl do truly treat them very well. But they may be ignorant of the girl getting her hopes up.

    It's really understanding the girl and how she can handle it.

    I did that once with a nurse from Bangkok International. I was living there and a bit full of myself, thinking I can get any girl I'm interested in.....it's human nature to think that when in Thailand at times.
    Wrangled a date with the nurse that cleaned my MB injuries.
    Very pretty and had a good time but after 2 dates it was evident she would want more and I just thought it would be unfair to keep seeing her since I didn't want to settle down.
    And to be honest......I think I was more into the fact I "scored a nurse" than the actual girl herself
    Good post, Paul. I do believe you are correct with all of that. What someone says, and what someone feels can be two different things entirely. I don't think anyone on this forum wants to hurt anyone, but I'm positive that we have all hurt someone at some point because we didn't truly understand that person. It's only later that we find out.

    Three years ago when I was living with Pui in Chiang Mai for 4 months, I was going back home to Canada for my usual 7 months at home, but said I was coming back in November... like I always do. But, Pui became truly unreasonable and bitchy on our last few days together. I could not figure her out. I said I was coming back and she could stay in our room that I had already paid for, but she was still grumpy and unreasonable. Then, it dawned on me, every man that she had ever cared for prior to me, had left and never came back. What someone says, and what someone does can be entirely different.
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