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Thread: The conundrums of having a Thai partner.

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    ประเทศไทยเพื่อน Founding Member Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน jontymate's Avatar
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    The conundrums of having a Thai partner.

    Recently spent a month in LOS. Songkran and all that to visit family. Some site seeing and to pay respect to the king.

    The BKK experience was like no other. My wife has sold her residence in BKK so we stayed at a nice 5 star hotel on the river. The Ramada or Rah-mah-Dah.... It was close to the Grand Palace.

    I spent 5 hours to line up dressed in black in the hot sun. We were given water and had fans as we moved through the line. I was the only farang... to the point many pictures were taken of me as an oddity. Some that I thought were taking selfies of family .....I moved out of the way and they moved to include me 5555.

    Some comments from the crowd was nice but many was not. Most thinking I would not understand as I spoke English. In particular an official stopped me at every point to take off my glasses. To roll down my sleeves to cover more and button up . Though many Thai men were dressed less.

    I got internally so angry I just wanted to wipe out this small dictatorial man in uniform. First time ever in LOS.

    Went in and 15 seconds to pay respect then out. Okay just thought things you do for a cross cultural relationship.

    Was free food and more water on the way out and pictures of the king were given out in a manner you must take but not offered to me.

    I have never felt more unwelcome in Thailand
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    Uber Star Soi wanderer Uber Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน Cuzzy's Avatar
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    That is a real shame.

    I can understand some Thai may think of you as not being genuine about paying respect and that you are possibly pandering to your own ego by being there.

    All the same, it is showing big disrespect to not only you, but the memory of the King they so revere. I think he wouldn't have condoned that sort of behaviour at all.

    Loss of face for them.

    Good on you for going.

    I can't help feeling there is possibly some underlying racism, but hey, that exists in my country as well. We can choose to ignore it as best we can but the memory lingers.

    I did some research into Negativity Bias and how we are 'programed' to negativity. Maybe their grief elevated the likelyhood of an adverse reaction to your prescence.


    Au wants us to go as a family when I return later this year, something they are all eagre to do. I asked her if she thought it appropriate for me to go. She told me quite frankly, 'you not go our family not go'. Family being the SILs BILs MIL cuzzies and bros.
    I'm lucky to feel very included in the family now.
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    Hi all my future wife lives in bangkok and did the same as you jontymate but 9 times good luck or something she also said that we might go or something when i get there but i dont know .I know it would please her but after your description i am not so sure .she has sent me the picture of the king ect as i sent her a news clipping from here when the king and queen both visited back in 1962 i think her friends were quite amazed at it ,as for farang my partner commented how good it was to see the farang paying respect to the king im with cozzy well done for going .
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    Uber Star Soi wanderer Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน MarcTwoSix's Avatar
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    Wow
    I am surprised you got negativity from the Thais for being there.
    Because I think they are genuinely pleased when a farang shows interest in their culture or is willing to endure the heat and wait with fellow Thais.

    The last I'd have thought

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    Foundation Member Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน Minder's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Minder View Post
    Attachment 14028Attachment 14027Attachment 14026Attachment 14025Attachment 14024Attachment 14023

    Big day yesterday.
    Took Mrs M to the Throne room of the Grand Palace where the late HRH lays in state.

    Sounds easy when you say it like that.
    Logistical nightmare x 10....

    I did see one other farang in the crowd inside.
    I needed to produce ID (photocopy of passport) but so did all the Thais.
    I was searched I think more thoroughly than was the average Thai - but professionally.

    Got there at 4am and into the Throne Room around 10am. Exiting the grounds by 10 past.
    No regrets.
    Sorry for your experience Jonty ... luck of the draw on the day I guess .... my own experience was totally positive and as M26 says most Thais seemed "genuinely pleased" I felt enough for his Majesty to make the effort ....

    For me it was a truly positive and inclusive experience .... a real shame yours was not .....
    Last edited by Minder; 27th May 2017 at 22:18. Reason: Add pic
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    ประเทศไทยเพื่อน Founding Member Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน jontymate's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Minder View Post





    Sorry for your experience Jonty ... luck of the draw on the day I guess .... my own experience was totally positive and as M26 says most Thais seemed "genuinely pleased" I felt enough for his Majesty to make the effort ....

    For me it was a truly positive and inclusive experience .... a real shame yours was not .....
    I guess a time can be spoiled by one or two.

    Funny we have the same pictures

    IMG_5466 (4).jpgIMG_5473 (2).jpg

    Dao also not backward in speaking out which did not help 555
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    Quote Originally Posted by Minder View Post
    my own experience was totally positive and as M26 says most Thais seemed "genuinely pleased" I felt enough for his Majesty to make the effort ....

    For me it was a truly positive and inclusive experience .... a real shame yours was not .....
    I have also been and found the Thai's very gracious that I was attended and showing respect.

    I knew a few friends that have been and said the same thing that the Thais really respected the effort.
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    Uber Star Soi wanderer Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน Moo Uaon's Avatar
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    PeteGill, 1080, Ian Forbes and 1 others like this.
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    Uber Star Soi wanderer Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน
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    Quote Originally Posted by jontymate View Post
    I guess a time can be spoiled by one or two.

    Dao also not backward in speaking out which did not help 555
    It is always just one or two that can totally ruin a day. I've had some bad experiences with both police and border guards and I have to keep telling myself that they are the exception rather than the rule.

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    Uber Star Soi wanderer Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน RakThai's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Moo Uaon View Post
    One of the reasons my daughter wants to visit the USA for a holiday is because she wants to go to a drive-in cinema (don't have those here, too cold in winter and too much rain the rest of the year)..
    I told her to better hurry, because by now most people carry their cinema in their I-pad cover..

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    Uber Star Soi wanderer Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน slampay's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by RakThai View Post
    One of the reasons my daughter wants to visit the USA for a holiday is because she wants to go to a drive-in cinema (don't have those here, too cold in winter and too much rain the rest of the year)..
    I told her to better hurry, because by now most people carry their cinema in their I-pad cover..

    Yes, she better hurry. The death of drive in isn't because of the I-pad, it's because of the land that they are/where on is worth much more as a housing or mall development...by many multiples. Sad because I have a lot of amazing memories of nights at a drive-in...both good and bad. 555
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    Uber Star Soi wanderer Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน slampay's Avatar
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    ^^ as an example we used to have an x-rated drive in theater near where I grew up...it was just plain crazy and I'll let you guys get you own mental imagine of the scene.

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    Lamai Beach Bum Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน bacwaan's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by slampay View Post
    ^^ as an example we used to have an x-rated drive in theater near where I grew up...it was just plain crazy and I'll let you guys get you own mental imagine of the scene.
    I'd hate the job of washing down the fences after you and your mates had been up there for a gander...555

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    Lamai Beach Bum Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน bacwaan's Avatar
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    I used to love the Drive-Inns in AUS...saw many great westerns and Elvis movies as a kid in those...(I'm talking 50+ years ago here)...we'd go with our folks and have to shower and dress ready for bed in PJs, dressing gown and slippers beforehand as we always fell asleep in the back of the car...so we were easily poured into bed afterwards...they mostly had double headers so it was about 3-4 hours a session and the consession stand had great hot dogs, orange cordial and popcorn...it was just about the only time we were allowed to eat crap food...
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    Quote Originally Posted by slampay View Post
    Yes, she better hurry. The death of drive in isn't because of the I-pad, it's because of the land that they are/where on is worth much more as a housing or mall development...by many multiples. Sad because I have a lot of amazing memories of nights at a drive-in...both good and bad. 555
    Did you ever get to see the end of the movies at any of the drive-ins? We had a Rambler stationwagon and the windows were too fogged up to see anything.

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    Uber Star Soi wanderer Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน slampay's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ian Forbes View Post
    Did you ever get to see the end of the movies at any of the drive-ins? We had a Rambler stationwagon and the windows were too fogged up to see anything.
    My uncle owned a drive in theater near Phoenix Arizona and I would spend the summers working there...he actually lived on sight and man o man did I see some crazy stuff! Lol
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    Uber Star Soi wanderer Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน Moo Uaon's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by slampay View Post
    My uncle owned a drive in theater near Phoenix Arizona and I would spend the summers working there...he actually lived on sight and man o man did I see some crazy stuff! Lol
    how many torn off speaker wires in the old days? 55
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    Uber Star Soi wanderer Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน slampay's Avatar
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    Not so much broken speakers because they and the connecting wires were pretty much unbreakable. Lots and lots of broken glass though.
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    ประเทศไทยเพื่อน Founding Member Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน Changone's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by slampay View Post
    Not so much broken speakers because they and the connecting wires were pretty much unbreakable. Lots and lots of broken glass though.
    ^And the old school speakers were great heavy metal ones...555

    Later in the piece they had sound that would play thru your car radio..

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    ประเทศไทยเพื่อน Founding Member Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน PeteGill's Avatar
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    Yip, sadly drive in's have been replaced by drive by's...
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