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Thread: Thais and Thank You

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    Uber Star Soi wanderer Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน MarcTwoSix's Avatar
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    Thais and Thank You

    I was just thinking about this when researching flights and villa rentals for Siem Reap

    Bringing my MIL and stepson will cost me an extra 1500cad probably for a weekend
    And I am more than happy to take them............I love spending time with them

    But they don't really say thank you
    My stepson does if I buy him something material but not in any other instance

    Like if I take my sister away for a weekend, or take my nephews out to dinner, they will always say thank you
    I even heard a young kid thank his Dad the other day for buying him a drink

    And I know they appreciate these things, they just don't express it.............I guess just a culture thing

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    Uber Star Soi wanderer Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน RakThai's Avatar
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    ^^ It is!

    Has to do with the respect / face thing, thanking is like buying off the debt created by a good action with a simple word..

    Thais do that with a servant or to answer a simple gesture, but cannot do that with something big, which they can never repay..
    So they add the credit to your Bun Khun credit, which they will repay when you need it.. ( unlikely, but if you get incapacitated for some reason they will take care of you).

    Even more difficult with family, because different rules apply. Sharing within family is the norm and not seen as something special (even though they know it is).
    And thanking family is more like an insult than a compliment..
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    Lamai Beach Bum Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน bacwaan's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by RakThai View Post
    ^^ It is!

    Has to do with the respect / face thing, thanking is like buying off the debt created by a good action with a simple word..

    Thais do that with a servant or to answer a simple gesture, but cannot do that with something big, which they can never repay..
    So they add the credit to your Bun Khun credit, which they will repay when you need it.. ( unlikely, but if you get incapacitated for some reason they will take care of you).

    Even more difficult with family, because different rules apply. Sharing within family is the norm and not seen as something special (even though they know it is).
    And thanking family is more like an insult than a compliment..
    all similar enough to my understanding of Buhn Kuhn when its Thai on Thai..however I am not so sure that the concept extends to farangs in all Thai families...

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    Uber Star Soi wanderer Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน RakThai's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by bacwaan View Post
    all similar enough to my understanding of Buhn Kuhn when its Thai on Thai..however I am not so sure that the concept extends to farangs in all Thai families...
    Surely not, but after 10 years I think Paul has his role and merit well-established in his family..

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    Uber Star Soi wanderer Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน MarcTwoSix's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by RakThai View Post
    Surely not, but after 10 years I think Paul has his role and merit well-established in his family..
    I'm not really that concerned with it, as I said I know they do appreciate it

    Just commenting on how different it is, but that is just parts of different cultures


    And actually now that I am thinking about it, my MIL says thank you a lot, probably one of the phrase she says most in English!

    So I don't know what the hell I'm talking about 555


    but you explanation was informative
    Last edited by MarcTwoSix; 14th March 2018 at 04:28.

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    Bun Kun, doesn't really factor into them saying Thank you or Wai for something.

    Westerners do go overboard with thank you's to the point that you say it whenever someone does something for you, its almost a throw away line in a lot or circumstances.

    Thai's generally do it more when its deserved.

    If they don't Wai or say thank you (English/Thai) in those circumstance it generally comes down to either a lack of respect for you or bad manners.

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    Uber Star Soi wanderer Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน supersub's Avatar
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    On a small scale I notice that when given them way say if you are wanting to walk through a door and let them through 1st. Something like taking someone on holiday though....

    Maybe they just think we all have money growing out of our ass so it's no big deal to spend it on them.

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    Uber Star Soi wanderer Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน MarcTwoSix's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by phaisan View Post
    Westerners do go overboard with thank you's to the point that you say it whenever someone does something for you, its almost a throw away line in a lot or circumstances.
    .
    I don't find that at all and I live in the land of Thank You's!!

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    Quote Originally Posted by RakThai View Post
    ^^ It is!

    Has to do with the respect / face thing, thanking is like buying off the debt created by a good action with a simple word..

    Thais do that with a servant or to answer a simple gesture, but cannot do that with something big, which they can never repay..
    So they add the credit to your Bun Khun credit, which they will repay when you need it.. ( unlikely, but if you get incapacitated for some reason they will take care of you).

    Even more difficult with family, because different rules apply. Sharing within family is the norm and not seen as something special (even though they know it is).
    And thanking family is more like an insult than a compliment..
    Thing is though, if you go out of your way to gift something you are not obliged to and at a cost (time, effort or money), it comes over as just a wee bit rude not to respond with something which costs now't, yet can be of such high value to the recipient - an uttered appreciation, in the form of a "thank you".

    Whatever your culture, surely that SHOULD BE a given?

    Why is it I'm always expected to appreciate and make allowances for another's culture but little to no thought is afforded to their considering mine?

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    Uber Star Soi wanderer Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน MarcTwoSix's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by BunnyGee View Post

    Why is it I'm always expected to appreciate and make allowances for another's culture but little to no thought is afforded to their considering mine?
    I actually find that rife in Asia, more than any place in the world I have travelled

    I believe you are expected to adhere to customs in Asia moreso than any other region(ive never been to the Middle East) but I don't think Asians adhere to our customs when here in the West at all

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    Quote Originally Posted by MarcTwoSix View Post
    I actually find that rife in Asia, more than any place in the world I have travelled

    I believe you are expected to adhere to customs in Asia moreso than any other region(ive never been to the Middle East) but I don't think Asians adhere to our customs when here in the West at all
    I certainly haven't seen them queuing up at the local "Chippie", at tea-time, on Fridays.
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    Uber Star Soi wanderer Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน Dupree's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by BunnyGee View Post
    Thing is though, if you go out of your way to gift something you are not obliged to and at a cost (time, effort or money), it comes over as just a wee bit rude not to respond with something which costs now't, yet can be of such high value to the recipient - an uttered appreciation, in the form of a "thank you".

    Whatever your culture, surely that SHOULD BE a given?

    Why is it I'm always expected to appreciate and make allowances for another's culture but little to no thought is afforded to their considering mine?
    You mean while you are in Thailand? Do you expect every country you visit to high five you too? 55
    I just girl in bar. Buy me one dink?....

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    Quote Originally Posted by Dupree View Post
    You mean while you are in Thailand? Do you expect every country you visit to high five you too? 55
    A bit presumptuous (even provocative) a reply, from you.

    Who's asking for a "high-five"?

    I respect and consider Thais' (and other's) belief's and customs when back in my own country (or any other) too.

    Do those who do not thank (due to their custom) suddenly begin to do so, when their aircraft touches down in another country? I think not.

    Are we allowed to walk head high, on one side of the border but required to bow, grovel and scrape once through Customs & Immigration?

    Don't be an idiot.

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    Uber Star Soi wanderer Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน MarcTwoSix's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by BunnyGee View Post
    A bit presumptuous (even provocative) a reply, from you.

    Who's asking for a "high-five"?

    I respect and consider Thais' (and other's) belief's and customs when back in my own country (or any other) too.

    Do those who do not thank (due to their custom) suddenly begin to do so, when their aircraft touches down in another country? I think not.

    Are we allowed to walk head high, on one side of the border but required to bow, grovel and scrape once through Customs & Immigration?

    Don't be an idiot.
    I think what he is saying is how do you expect them to know your culture if they never been?

    My gripe, as a I said, is I feel they hit you over the head with their culture in Asia(which I don't mind, even enjoy) but a good majority of Asians tend to ignore our culture when here

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    Quote Originally Posted by MarcTwoSix View Post
    I think what he is saying is how do you expect them to know your culture if they never been?

    My gripe, as a I said, is I feel they hit you over the head with their culture in Asia(which I don't mind, even enjoy) but a good majority of Asians tend to ignore our culture when here
    I educate myself to understand their culture. Is it too much to ask them to reciprocate?

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    Uber Star Soi wanderer Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน Dupree's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by BunnyGee View Post
    A bit presumptuous (even provocative) a reply, from you.

    Who's asking for a "high-five"?

    I respect and consider Thais' (and other's) belief's and customs when back in my own country (or any other) too.

    Do those who do not thank (due to their custom) suddenly begin to do so, when their aircraft touches down in another country? I think not.

    Are we allowed to walk head high, on one side of the border but required to bow, grovel and scrape once through Customs & Immigration?

    Don't be an idiot.
    You're the idiot. Expecting every county to roll out the Western Red Carpet for you. Get a clue man.
    I just girl in bar. Buy me one dink?....

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    Uber Star Soi wanderer Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน Dupree's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by BunnyGee View Post
    I educate myself to understand their culture. Is it too much to ask them to reciprocate?
    There should be a mandatory class in all foreign schools on how to treat the Westerner when he visits your country. It's insane that they don't!..555
    I just girl in bar. Buy me one dink?....

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    Uber Star Soi wanderer Thai Dreamer ผู้เพ้อฝัน MarcTwoSix's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by BunnyGee View Post
    I educate myself to understand their culture. Is it too much to ask them to reciprocate?
    You are saying they should reciprocate towards your culture in their country?

    That makes no sense if so

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    Quote Originally Posted by MarcTwoSix View Post
    You are saying they should reciprocate towards your culture in their country?

    That makes no sense if so
    Is your first language English, as you appear to have either misread or misunderstood my post?

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    Quote Originally Posted by Dupree View Post
    You're the idiot. Expecting every county to roll out the Western Red Carpet for you. Get a clue man.
    You see, I didn't call you an idiot.

    I merely tried to guide you towards not being one, before you did.

    Seems my breath was wasted.

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