Are Thai village events(weddings/monk)held to make money?

[MarcTwoSix]

I've spoken about my wife wanting a big party for when her son does his Monk stint
And she really has been talking about it since he was a small child
I do believe she really wants one for the celebration

But she always says "We get the money back"

This weekend she attended to elaborate big weddings

One had 600 people and one had 700 people

And they just invite the family
My wife or her Mom gets a card and they are encouraged to bring however many family members
Which seems odd to me that they don't get a set #

But my wife is obsessed with the pricing of these things

She got the #'s for these big nice weddings
The band was 70k(that doesn't seem bad)

And it costs 1500baht for 1 table of 10(so 150baht/pp)

My wife gave 1500 for 3 people(so 500/each)

I could never fathom how someone knew 500-700 people you see at these events
But they don't really, it seems

It seems it's a money maker........

 

[MarcTwoSix]

A video and pic of events

 

[MarcTwoSix]

Ha

I think I added a couple of zeros
You don't make much money but you seem to get your money back 5555

 

[mechime]

When a relatives Son got his call up for the Army, they gave a big party, he ducked out of training as soon as he could, despite being at a camp 3Km away from his family, hence loosing the 3 months pay and forfeiting his ID for a year (cannot get regular employment without ID). My Thai wife's Son was called up for the Navy, she told him no party until you finish 555. He is stationed in Sattahip 700Km from home but sticking it out last 8 months.

 

[RakThai]

I've spoken about my wife wanting a big party for when her son does his Monk stint
And she really has been talking about it since he was a small child
I do believe she really wants one for the celebration

But she always says "We get the money back"

This weekend she attended to elaborate big weddings

One had 600 people and one had 700 people

And they just invite the family
My wife or her Mom gets a card and they are encouraged to bring however many family members
Which seems odd to me that they don't get a set #

But my wife is obsessed with the pricing of these things

She got the #'s for these big nice weddings
The band was 70k(that doesn't seem bad)

And it costs 1500baht for 1 table of 10(so 150baht/pp)

My wife gave 1500 for 3 people(so 500/each)

I could never fathom how someone knew 500-700 people you see at these events
But they don't really, it seems

It seems it's a money maker........

Funny how even after 10 years of marriage to a Thai lady, you still like to value Thai culture to western standards..

To answer your question first, no one makes any money!
Not the one hosting the event, nor the ones attending..

The only money "made" goes to the bride and groom in case of marriage,
To the family of the diseased in the case of a funeral,
and to the boy who is going to be monk in the pre-monk party..

So what's the motivation?
First and foremost, it's like a family reunion.. Traditional Thai families are poor farmers, and the land is never enough to divide between the children,
So one of those continue the farm, the rest "Go Bangkok" to find work.
Nowadays people are more mobile, but traditionally the only reason to return to the families village would be Sonkran, funerals, marriages and monk ceremonies...

Second is face!
The one organizing the party gains face the more people attend!
The biggest party will be talked about for a long time and the organizer can gain significant status..

Same for the ones attending.. The more you contribute to the party or the family who organizes the party,
the more you show your standing, generosity.. Naam jai, greng jai and bun kun.

But still, it's still just a family gathering..
If you want to compare it to anything American, it's like hosting a Sweet Sixteen party for your spoiled little brad.. 555

 

[MarcTwoSix]

Funny how even after 10 years of marriage to a Thai lady, you still like to value Thai culture to western standards..

To answer your question first, no one makes any money!
Not the one hosting the event, nor the ones attending..

The only money "made" goes to the bride and groom in case of marriage,
To the family of the diseased in the case of a funeral,
and to the boy who is going to be monk in the pre-monk party..

So what's the motivation?
First and foremost, it's like a family reunion.. Traditional Thai families are poor farmers, and the land is never enough to divide between the children,
So one of those continue the farm, the rest "Go Bangkok" to find work.
Nowadays people are more mobile, but traditionally the only reason to return to the families village would be Sonkran, funerals, marriages and monk ceremonies...

Second is face!
The one organizing the party gains face the more people attend!
The biggest party will be talked about for a long time and the organizer can gain significant status..

Same for the ones attending.. The more you contribute to the party or the family who organizes the party,
the more you show your standing, generosity.. Naam jai, greng jai and bun kun.

But still, it's still just a family gathering..
If you want to compare it to anything American, it's like hosting a Sweet Sixteen party for your spoiled little brad.. 555

And 3 years of having a girlfriend you seem to think you know all 5555


PS.....My stepson can get whatever is leftover of the cost of any big party thrown.
Always happy to pay for any intimate event with close family and friends involved.
I don't do parties for face......Western or Thai

 

[OZZYGUY]

I don't do parties for face......Western or Thai

You don't because its not really our culture, but does your wife?

 

[Quarky]

You don't because its not really our culture, but does your wife?

But is it really culture? Or ego? It's like trying to explain away corruption or mistreatment of women as cultural, when it's just poor behaviour.

 

[OZZYGUY]

But is it really culture? Or ego? It's like trying to explain away corruption or mistreatment of women as cultural, when it's just poor behaviour.

I say its culture, Keeping face is the beliefs, customs, and habits of the Thai people, also some other nationalities. Very strong in China.

Just like corruption is a big part of the Philippines culture.

 

[Quarky]

I say its culture, Keeping face is the beliefs, customs, and habits of the Thai people, also some other nationalities. Very strong in China.

Just like corruption is a big part of the Philippines culture.

But all cultures have face. And corruption. We have it. I don't think it's cultural when every culture has it. I tend to think cultural means unique to that culture...

That's why I agree with Paulie's stance on it.

 

[MarcTwoSix]

You don't because its not really our culture, but does your wife?

Then she can pay for it
I will definitely have fun at any party she throws 5555

As I said. I would pay and cover for any intimate party with close family and friends
I just don't believe in big parties where you don't know half the people that well.

 

[OZZYGUY]

As I said. I would pay and cover for any intimate party with close family and friends
I just don't believe in big parties where you don't know half the people that well.

Im with you and how could you possibly know 700 people.....55 Im happy to pay for the small party but wouldn't pay for a bunch of free loaders just to keep face.

 

[MarcTwoSix]

I say its culture, Keeping face is the beliefs, customs, and habits of the Thai people, also some other nationalities. Very strong in China.

Just like corruption is a big part of the Philippines culture.

As Quarky said.
Every culture has some sort of "face"
And every culture then distorts their form of "face"

What I always find amusing is so many guys rail against our form of face yet so willingly accept it in Asia, for some reason

 

[OZZYGUY]

But all cultures have face. And corruption. We have it. I don't think it's cultural when every culture has it. I tend to think cultural means unique to that culture...

That's why I agree with Paulie's stance on it.

But some cultures have it stronger than others, eg. corruption in Pi and Indo is much more accepted than Thailand. Face is more important to Chinese and Thai people than other countries. Drinking beer is much more accepted in Australia than PI. etc etc.

Its what makes up that culture and the people in each country isn't it?

 

[MarcTwoSix]

Im with you and how could you possibly know 700 people.....55 Im happy to pay for the small party but wouldn't pay for a bunch of free loaders just to keep face.

We had 3 small wedding dinners

One at Summer Breeze, which Bill did a nice job with the Thai/Western buffet along with I had Don's BBQ

Then we had a very nice dinner with Ao's Mom and brothers and sister

Then a very nice dinner in a private room at an Italian restaurant in Toronto for about 30 of us
We had an awesome weekend with our friends and family

 

[OZZYGUY]

We had 3 small wedding dinners

One at Summer Breeze, which Bill did a nice job with the Thai/Western buffet along with I had Don's BBQ

Then we had a very nice dinner with Ao's Mom and brothers and sister

Then a very nice dinner in a private room at an Italian restaurant in Toronto for about 30 of us
We had an awesome weekend with our friends and family

And the Italians have big weddings as well......

 

[Dupree]

And the Italians have big weddings as well......

But at least they are related..

 

[MarcTwoSix]

And the Italians have big weddings as well......

Yes
The area I grew up in has big weddings
My sister's wedding was about 350 people
I remember being at my Aunt's house the morning of the wedding.
Everyone stressed out, freaking about every little detail.
I decided that day I'd never have a big wedding....

And Brooklyn where my ex-gf was from has huge weddings

My ex-gf wanted to spend 75kusd on a wedding

For one night in some generic room....

 

[OZZYGUY]

My ex-gf wanted to spend 75kusd on a wedding

75k........no wonder she is your ex............555

My wedding cost 10k AUD for everything, food, video, photos, nice venue on the coast, rental wedding dress and suits etc. And we had a wedding organizer do it all. About 100 people.

 

[MarcTwoSix]

75k........no wonder she is your ex............555

My wedding cost 10k AUD for everything, food, video, photos, nice venue on the coast, rental wedding dress and suits etc. And we had a wedding organizer do it all. About 100 people.

Our party at SB costs about 35k baht

And our wedding dinner in Toronto was around 8k cad total
We paid for everyone's hotel room for the weekend because they spent money to fly to Toronto.
So I felt we should take care of the rooms.
Dinner, which was amazing, was about 6k cad.

So 3 parties right around the same price as yours